How do i love you?

Teach me how to love you.
Teach me how to take what you’re feeling towards me and reciprocate that onto you.
Teach me how to care about you.
Take me out of the darkness that is my mind. Cut the weeds and vines that have wrapped themselves around my decaying heart – give my heart that golden hour sunlight.
Teach me how not to have the urge to lick my now infected wounds
Keep my tongue away from my arm and from following the trail of dried blood to my elbows.
Take the thoughts about not cutting horizontally so i can cut vertically because ruining my mother’s carpet is the worst thing that can happen if i did that.
Teach me to want to slice myself open for attention, rather than to not have to count slit marks from oldest to most recent in order to fall asleep.
Teach me how to love you.
Hold my hands when they shake to get you a glass of water and teach me how to not daydream about the glass breaking and picking shards out of my hands like i picked his scent off of my skin and scrubbed myself clean until i could compare leftover skin with my snake friends’ skin – Teach me how to love the skin that you’re in.
Let me know if my telling you that i took one pill instead of 15 impresses you, or you would rather i lasted 15 minutes.
Please. Please be sure to kiss your knuckles so that your fist feels warm against my cheeks.
TEACH. ME. HOW. TO. LOVE. YOU.
Because i sure as hell don’t remember what it’s like to like myself let alone love you.
i need you to teach me how to love you
Teach me how to love

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2 thoughts on “How do i love you?

  1. Love your writing babes, I always have !! ❀πŸ”₯ You are so gifted: never stop 😘
    Looking forward to your next piece xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

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